Family and Friends

I've been thinking about family lately. I had dinner with a cousin of mine the other night and just thought how thankful I am that I get to know her as a person and a friend and then in addition be happy that she's related to me.

But with so much of my family, that is not the case. I love them because they're mine--my brother or my cousin or my aunt or uncle...but so very rarely because they are who they are--because they're sensitive, or artistic or insightful or witty--these things so often get overlooked in our family, when these very qualities would be sought for in friends.

And even more seriously, I find that I tend to overlook common courtesy when it comes to my family. How often do I neglect my family or ignore them or fail to stay in touch, when I would never dream of treating friends that way?

Ironically, when we do these things to family because we've taken them for granted for so long, we lose the chance to see those qualities that might make them friends as well.

This weekend, my brother is celebrating his marriage to his wife by holding the ceremony and reception that they didn't have when they got married five years ago. Our families--hers and ours, of course, will come together...but more poignantly, family from both sides of my own family will be in the same room--for the first time in almost 30 years. Those of you who have any experience with divorced parents can understand what a momentous occasion this will be.

I'm hoping to take time to talk to folks--those related to me and those not, so I can be blessed by the wonders that can be found in people---related by blood or by heart.

In the Dark

So, I know God has good purposes. He uses things in our lives to teach us new truths. He brings us to strange places to show us something we've never seen before so we can know him more. This is very good to know when things seem difficult.

But what if things keep happening. Friends keep moving far away, for instance--what is God trying to teach me? Coworkers are leaving work. Friends are leaving town. Is that stay here and hold the fort.. or get out now while the getting is good?

I'm a bit in the dark here. I'll let you know when the light dawns.

Brownie Violation

So I had a bit of a meltdown after a picnic this weekend. The reason? My brownies went missing. The scenario went like this.

We had our annual church picnic after church this Sunday. It's held at this beautiful state park in the area. Always a fun time of hanging out with the church family. You're usually asked to bring a salad or dessert. Since I don't ever think of these things ahead of time, I made my dessert right after church on Sunday. It was brownies (into which I threw m&ms) and they were just cool enough to pick up and throw into the car and be on my way. When I got there, I put them with the rest of the desserts (quite a haul, let me tell you) and went to await the opening of the food lines.

And so we ate. And toward the end of the eating, I noticed that no one had taken any of my brownies. Far from being insulted at this slight to my culinary abilities, I was excited. I could take a whole pan of brownies home. Have a few for dinner. Another couple for breakfast--this is great! Don't have to go grocery shopping for another couple days.

Later, a few friends and I decided to take a walk--and we ended up taking the hiking loop that covers 4 miles. It was a little longer than we expected, but it was good fun, and as we were approaching the end, I thought, great--at least we have a whole lot of brownies to eat when we return. We approached the picnic pavilion.

There stood a few ladies who very considerately had stuck around after everyone else had left because I had left my keys and purse on one of the tables. Thankful for their watchfulness I looked to the dessert table. And stopped. Where were my brownies? My big, uncut pan of chocolate? Um, there was an entire pan of brownies? Where did they go?

Oh, we gave them away.

You what???? "um.. who did you give them to?"

oh that family over there, as she points to a parking lot with quite a few remaining cars.

What family????? Who has my brownies--grrrrrr. "Um, they were in a pan--who did you give them to??"

Oh.. she names a family with a bunch of kids.

Great--can't take them back now--then I'd be a hoyden who steals treats from children. Um. Okay.

Meanwhile I'm telling myself that you really need to leave and get in your car because very shortly, you're going to throw a fit. And yell. And cry.. because mean people stole your brownies and gave them to children and you have to be a grown up and go without and you don't want to be seen doing this--so hurry up and get in your car.

I was mad. So I smiled, said see ya! and got in my car. My air fresheners were very nice not to laugh at me or make light of my distress, and I was able to vent my frustration loud and long.

And by some crazy coincidence, my mother also made brownies with m&ms for her church function and she was nice enough to share some of them with me the next day. So, no harm done.

But I think it was just that someone had stolen what was rightfully mine. I know it was greedy and petty to want them back--but sometimes, you really shouldn't meddle with other peoples' chocolate.