Ready or not

This weekend I went to a wedding at my church. The groom is only about seven years younger than me, but when I started attending, he was sixteen. Now he’s out of college and an actual adult and getting married to a beautiful girl and I’m thinking in my head—he can’t possibly get married! He’s just a kid.

And my cynical self turns to me and says, well, you’re just bitter because he’s getting married and you’re not. And I suppose part of that might be true, but there’s more to it than that. It’s not just that he’s getting married and I want to…it’s just that getting married seems like an awful grown-up thing to do. Like, you really should have most of your life and identity together before you go and attempt to link it with someone else’s.

Maybe it’s his maturity level that I envy. Because most days, I can’t possibly convince myself that I am any where near ready to be where I am in life, let alone where I want to be.

But are you ever really ready? Isn’t every step of the journey a leap of faith? I mean, some days it takes faith to take that first step out of bed. It sure would take a whole lot of faith to step into marriage.

Maybe that’s the key. I feel overwhelmed when I think I need to do everything or have everything figured out. Maybe maturity comes from knowing for sure that I don’t know anything for sure, except that I don’t have it together, or “what it takes” and probably never will---but having the faith that God will show me each step when I need to know and give me the grace and courage to follow Him, wherever that may lead.

And ready or not, life is a leap. So may the Lord increase our faith.